"Mother," Qin shi said softly, "you must be disappointed in me. If I hadn't been so stubborn back then, I probably would be living a good life now, wouldn't I?"
Madam Qin wiped away a tear. "At least I wouldn't have been poisoned and lost half my life..."
"Poisoned?" Qin shi's brow furrowed slightly. "I'm like this because I was poisoned?"
Madam Qin called for Nanny Li to come in, and she recounted the whole story.
"So, that maid was seeking revenge for Dong Ningwan?" Qin shi's voice was very low, almost a murmur. "Dong Ningwan is dead, but what does this have to do with me?"
Madam Qin said indignantly, "Who knows what that maid was thinking? I always felt it wasn't that maid who did it, but her words were so convincing that there was no flaw, and she then ran headfirst into a pillar and died on the spot, claiming responsibility for her actions."
Qin shi fell silent. The point wasn't who poisoned her, but that the Dong family, the Duke's household, and Gu Siya had always believed Dong Ningwan died at her hands. For nearly twenty years, they had thought so. It was laughable. All these years, she hadn't been able to warm Gu Changwei's heart. His true affection was all for Dong Ningwan and their son. He had never even bothered to open his eyes for her and Ah Nian.
She, Qin Tingxue, was truly overestimating herself, always believing she could be the one in his eyes and heart.
"Mother, after I was poisoned, did he come to see me?" A sliver of hope remained.
Speaking of this, Madam Qin's anger flared. Gu Changwei had taken away Dong Ningxin and the maid's corpse. It was said he had also sent a considerable amount of silver to the maid's family, even going so far as to return their deeds of sale. All these actions represented his attitude: he didn't resent the maid's actions but rather approved of them.
The maid had repeatedly claimed to be avenging Dong Ningwan, and Gu Changwei was essentially admitting that Dong Ningwan had died at Qin Tingxue's hands.
At this moment, Madam Qin wanted to comfort Qin shi, but she also wanted Qin shi to completely give up on Gu Changwei. Therefore, she didn't hide anything, explaining how Gu Changwei had taken the bodies away, and in the two days since, not only had he not shown his face, but he hadn't even sent someone to inquire about her.
Qin shi listened to Madam Qin's words in a daze, her pale face devoid of any expression. After a long while, she managed a bitter smile.
"So, he has always believed that I caused Dong Ningwan's death."
Qin shi suddenly remembered what Gu Changwei had said to her a month after Dong Ningwan's death: that he would only ever love Dong Ningwan in this life, but he believed Dong Ningwan's incident was not her doing. Perhaps, he had been forced to say this by the elders of the Gu family, to reassure her.
Was this perhaps heaven's punishment for her self-conceit?
She had deluded herself into thinking she could enter Gu Changwei's heart, she had deluded herself into thinking Dong Ningwan was no match for her, she had deluded herself into thinking they would live in harmony.
The best years of her life had been completely wasted in self-deception. Truly...
"Tingxue, cry if you're hurting. Seeing you like this pains my heart," Madam Qin said, looking at Qin shi with concern.
Qin shi forced a smile. "Mother, I've been lost for so many years; it's time I woke up. Don't worry, I won't do anything rash, and I won't harbor any more desires. But I can't return to the Qin family. I must stay here to watch over Ah Nian. Mother, Ah Nian is my only child. I want to see him marry and have children, and live a smooth life. If I return to the Qin family and leave him here alone, with them eyeing Ah Nian's position as heir, who knows what they might do?"
Madam Qin sighed deeply. "My child!"
"Mother, where is Ah Nian?"
"He went to pick up your mother-in-law. He said he was supposed to leave after the fifteenth, but he left early this morning, on the eleventh. Before he left, he instructed me to stay at the Duke's mansion and look after you until he returns." Madam Qin said.
"Mother, isn't that a bit improper? What about the family..."
"I've made arrangements for the family. Your elder and second sisters-in-law are there. I've also kept it from your father, telling him you were ill and I came to look after you for a few days. If your father knew you were poisoned, he'd likely make a huge fuss. If you were willing to come home, a fuss wouldn't matter. Since you're not returning, I can only keep it from him for now." Madam Qin sighed. "Mother now often thinks of the days when you were still unmarried, eating meals with Mother, and telling her jokes from time to time..."
Qin shi nestled in Madam Qin's arms. "I also miss those times."
"Therefore, Mother has decided to stay here and accompany you. Let's see who dares to bully you," Madam Qin said in a low voice. "We'll take things one step at a time."
On the fifteenth day of the first lunar month, the Qi family was bustling with activity. Qi Zhenzhen woke up early and busied herself. After cleaning the house inside and out, she began preparing the ingredients for lunch.
She pushed her maternal grandmother, Madam Lin, into the room to sit. "Grandma, you can't steal my work today."
Mid-morning, the Lin family arrived.
Old Master Lin led the way, accompanied by his grandsons Lin Ruichun and Lin Ruixia, their wives, and the two younger grandchildren of the Lin family.
Lin Ruichun and Lin Ruixia had been coming to the Qi family to pick up goods daily, so they were already familiar with Qi Zhenzhen and Madam Yun. The two aunts from the Lin family also had cheerful dispositions, their smiles evident in their expressions. The two younger children were hosted by Li Hu and Qi Yi. Being of similar ages, they quickly became as close as brothers who had grown up together.
Seeing the lively atmosphere at home, Qi Zhenzhen's mood was also very good. As noon approached, Magistrate Song and Madam Yu arrived with Song Mingyue.
For the ceremony of recognizing adoptive kinship, a witness was necessary, and Magistrate Song was the undisputed choice. Moreover, his presence would allow him to converse with Old Master Lin. Madam Yu was there to chat with the two aunts from the Lin family, while Song Mingyue was purely there to freeload a meal.
There were no girls her age in the Lin family, and the adults' conversations were uninteresting to her. The boys' discussions seemed childish to her. Song Mingyue could only stay in the kitchen, helping Qi Zhenzhen pick and wash vegetables.
"Zhenzhen, I have something to tell you," Song Mingyue said mysteriously.
Qi Zhenzhen was skillfully gutting a fish. It was brought by the Lin family; this time it wasn't a sea fish, but a rather large bighead carp, weighing over ten pounds. Catching such a large fish in the middle of winter must have required considerable effort. She opened its belly, removed the scales, and with a sharp blade, sliced along its spine, dividing it into two large pieces. Song Mingyue watched, stunned.
"Didn't you say you had something to tell me? Why aren't you speaking?" Qi Zhenzhen looked up and saw Song Mingyue gaping, finding it amusing. "Were you scared?"
"Am I that timid? It's just that you're so adept with the knife, and the fish slices are so..." Song Mingyue couldn't help but swallow. "They're all the same thickness; how can an ordinary person do that? Tell me quickly, how did you learn this? Can I learn it too?"