Lu Mingzhe had lived for thirty years, and for the first time in his life, he was spending New Year's alone.
After returning home from the hospital, his mother called and texted him numerous times, wanting to visit him, but he refused to say a single word to her.
Several days in advance, his mother had already pleaded with him on WeChat to come home for the New Year. She argued that if not for her sake, he should at least consider their father. With both sons absent, it would be difficult for him to explain to their father.
Lu Mingzhe simply turned off his phone.
Ever since Xiang Wan had left, he had been staying at Lu Qingxu's club. Being alone in his room like this, like a wandering ghost, was too unbearable. His excessive worry had led to neurasthenia, causing him to be sleepless at night and sleep during the day.
Typically, as soon as he fell asleep, he would start dreaming, and upon waking, his limbs would feel weak and his body sluggish. Sleeping for too long during the day made him unable to sleep at night, so he would flip through all sorts of random TV shows and movies. The more he watched, the more sorrowful and despondent he felt, and the more he realized how lonely and difficult life was when he was by himself.
However, he still held onto a sliver of hope. He believed that Xiang Wan didn't truly want to leave him, that she was struggling and suffering in a place he couldn't see. She was just too proud to reach out.
Lu Mingzhe couldn't contact her, but she could contact him. Sooner or later, she would come to her senses, she would be unable to bear her longing, and she would call him back. New Year's Eve was the perfect opportunity.
Lu Mingzhe waited for New Year's Day with all the energy and patience he possessed. He turned on his phone early in the morning. He received calls from Zhan Beijue and Lu Qingxu. He wasn't in the mood to deal with them, so he exchanged a few perfunctory words and hung up. He stared intently at his phone screen, from six in the morning until nearly midnight.
The large television on the wall had been on all day, filled with lively and boisterous programs all related to the Spring Festival. At that moment, after a passionate address from four excited CCTV hosts, they were inviting all viewers to join them in the New Year's countdown.
Lu Mingzhe, who had been watching with eager anticipation, felt his heart pierced like a beehive. It was only then that he truly understood how ruthless and heartless Xiang Wan was. She wouldn't call him anymore. A strong thought told him: There's no need to wait. He would never receive her call again in this lifetime. It was New Year's, and she was probably having a big meal, setting off fireworks, playing games, and making New Year's wishes with someone else. How could she possibly spare a thought for him?
Lu Mingzhe hurled his phone violently onto the floor. He was so angry that he wanted to jump up and stomp on it several times with his foot. He wanted to use his entire rage to condemn the two heartless words, "Xiang Wan," displayed on his phone.
However, just as hope seemed to arrive, his phone lit up. The screen displayed the character "Xiang." He felt like a drowning person, exhausted by the waves, about to give up on survival, had seen a glimmer of hope. He excitedly snatched up his phone, only to see the words "Xiang Yang." Could Xiang Wan have called Xiang Yang to ask him to pass on a message? He rapidly switched between despair and joy, his hands trembling as he swiped to unlock the screen.
Xiang Yang's side was as quiet as his own. After a few seconds, he finally spoke. "Mingzhe, it's Xiang Yang."
Lu Mingzhe gathered all his strength to steady his trembling voice. "I know. Is there something?" This was the first time they had spoken calmly since Xiang Wan had left. Before, Lu Mingzhe would always rush to the school to find Xiang Yang and demand to know if Xiang Wan had called him. They would have a big argument every time they met. Because of this, Xiang Yang never contacted him proactively. On one hand, he was weary of Lu Mingzhe's violent temper and repelled by it; on the other hand, due to their previous pleasant interactions, he felt deeply guilty and unable to bear it. It was with this mindset that Xiang Yang called him tonight.
"It's nothing. It's New Year's, so I thought you'd definitely be alone, and I wanted to call and wish you well." He paused, then continued, "Although this might sound insincere and meaningless, I genuinely want to wish you a Happy New Year, Mingzhe."
Happy New Year. He called to wish him a Happy New Year. How ironic those two words were. Lu Mingzhe had been carefree and happy for 29 years, only to be brought down by a woman named Xiang Wan. For months, he hadn't known what happiness felt like. Still clinging to a shred of hope, he asked, "Did Xiang Wan ask you to tell me?"
Upon hearing this, Xiang Yang knew he was about to lose it again. Prepared to be scolded, he told the truth. "No. Just like you, I haven't received any calls or messages from her since that day." He continued, "This is the last time I'll call you. Without her in the middle, we are strangers." He added, "This year is over, and everything is in the past. I want to move forward, and I hope you will too. Don't think about her anymore, and let's not contact each other again."
Okay. Very well. Excellent.
Lu Mingzhe completely smashed his phone to pieces. He sank back onto the sofa, his whole body trembling. After pounding the cushions for a few seconds in a fit of rage, he suddenly felt it was all so meaningless. He used to look down on men like himself the most. He would lock his heart and seal off his love for a woman, blind to the beautiful scenery outside, and spend his days drowning in his personal emotions, oscillating between life and death. He was a psychologist! His specialty was regulating his own emotions, yet he had allowed himself to fall so low for so long! Xiang Yang had said something quite right: The New Year has arrived, and what's in the past should stay in the past. Having been a laughingstock for so long, he could consider this relationship to have come to a complete end. Lu Mingzhe, you can't continue to make such a fool of yourself. His 29 years of happy experiences told him that even on New Year's Eve, there were plenty of places for young people to find happiness.
Eileen Chang once said: There are only two ways to get over a relationship: time and a new love. Since time was not working for him, he decided to try a new love. Don't feel like I've wronged you, Xiang Wan. You're the one who forced me into this state.
Lu Mingzhe quickly washed up, put on his finest attire, and drove to Lu Qingxu's bar. As expected, the bar was crowded, with all sorts of young, beautiful girls dancing in the club, looking like a scene from paradise. He sat at the bar, sipped half a glass of cocktail, and approached a girl who looked the most stunning and caught his eye. The girl was clearly also a party-goer; she not only didn't reject his approach but was also quite proactive. The handsome man and beautiful woman quickly became close. The missing part of his heart was gradually filled by these fleeting moments of happiness, leaving him no time to think about Xiang Wan. On the first day of the New Year, Lu Mingzhe finally emerged briefly from Xiang Wan's shadow. He stayed at the bar until past five in the morning, and only when he was completely exhausted did he go home to sleep. That sleep was dreamless.