Chapter 116: Feelings exposed?
Hiroshi was taken aback by the man’s words. At first, he was in disbelief and next he wondered how bad he was at masking his feelings that the younger man could see it so clearly.
He bit the inside of his cheeks as his gaze got colder with the thoughts of what Haruki would do when he found out, if the young man told Haruki.
Kataro glanced around, and he noticed the panic in the man’s gaze. Running his fingers through his hair, he sighed tiredly before shaking his head as he said, "You don’t have to get worried that I will expose you. I am just warning you before it is too late. How can you fall in love with someone you have a contracted relationship with?"
The last thing Hiroshi wanted to see anymore was the look of pity in the man’s eyes. He felt he didn’t deserve pity. He didn’t want anyone to pity him over the feelings he had for Haruki.
He loved Haruki and that was not going to change for any reason. He wanted to remain in Haruki’s life regardless of what anyone thinks about his feelings.
"You don’t need to glare at me like that. I know what you are thinking. What right do I have to speak to you about such a thing when I tried to give Haruki a blow job? That was all survival. That was my only way to successfully escape Ren.
"I have told you my biggest secret. I don’t think you need to worry about me anymore. If Ren knows all I did was a plan, he will get me killed so trust your secret to stay safe in my brain. With that said, I think you should focus on the advice I just gave you."
Hiroshi sighed and shook his head. "I don’t know what came over you. You should worry about your mental state instead," Hiroshi denied the man’s words and made an attempt to leave but Kataro moved even closer to him.
"My brother, died because he was in love with Haruki. He made a mistake of falling in love with someone he signed a contract not to love. He was so in love with Haruki that he could not accept the break-up when Haruki abandoned him.
"He became so depressed that he could not go on with life. Haruki is the type of person anyone finds easy to love regardless of his personality and he doesn’t know how to reciprocate those feelings leaving the person abandoned and hurt.
"Since it is hard to go on, some of them find it hard to heal from the break-up. They lose their mind just like my brother did and died."
Hiroshi met the younger man’s gaze and the cold smile lifted up the corners of his lips as he asked, "Do you like Haruki?" Noticing how Kataro was taken aback by those words, Hiroshi’s smile broadened. "You do, don’t you? Everything you said about how easy it is to fall in love with Haruki. That was all you, right?"
It was Kataro’s turn to be surprised as his eyes widened. He parted his lips to speak but no words came out. Seeing that he was too stunned to speak and had frozen, Hiroshi pushed Kataro’s hand away and passed by him.
"I am neither you nor your brother," Hiroshi paused and reminded Kataro before continuing in the direction of Haruki’s room.
Kataro swallowed as his fists clenched tightly. He wondered what gave him the impression that Haruki was very easy to love. It was no wonder the doctor came to the conclusion that he was in love with Haruki.
Haruki reminded himself that out of sight was out of mind. The doctor was gone along with Kataro. As much he was curious about what happened between them, he focused on other things until it was time to leave.
The doctor was asleep deeply enjoying the cosiness of his bed and covers. He went into the closet to get dressed ignoring the man who continued to sleep. When he stepped out of the closet after a shower and dressing up, he could not ignore the man on the bed.
He walked to the man and reached for those gentle waves in the man’s light brown hair. Soft. Between his fingers, the hair felt soft almost softer than the hair of those women he had been with in the past.
He smiled and leaned close to the man and inhaled. The man’s hair smelled like his shampoo causing his smile to only broaden. The man smelled like him, the man was his and lying on his bed unguarded.
So handsome, too good to look at. His fingers traced the high bridge of the man’s nose until his fingers got to the man’s lips. He pinched the man’s chin and leaned even closer to kiss the man’s lips. Warm and soft, making him seek one but he was busy and almost late for his plans so he released the man.
The man still deserved a bit of punishment and he would not let the man get satisfaction until he was satisfied with the punishments the man would get.
After the door closed behind Haruki, Hiroshi opened his eyes. There was something absolutely mind-blowing about getting kissed secretly by the man he loved.
It took all of his willpower to hold back from kissing Haruki back, from parting his lips so that he could get a taste of the warmth hidden by those soft lips.
His heart pounded hard and something also gave a reaction of hardness. He sighed and closed his eyes hoping to get rid of that heat since he didn’t want to do anything without Haruki. He wanted every pleasure he got to come directly from Haruki.
Even as he reminded himself of this, he thought of how soft Haruki’s lips were against him and he wondered if he could just get off with the memories he had of being with Haruki but he brushed that thought off as soon as it came.
That younger man claimed Haruki was not someone who could love but he was almost certain that no one had ever received such a hidden kiss from Haruki. He was almost too certain of that with the memories of Haruki’s humiliating suggestion completely gone from his mind.
Joy filled his heart, he still had a chance with Haruki. Haruki did not send him away even after he had been gone for too long. He had to be special, right?
It could all be his imagination and he might even mean less to Haruki than any of Haruki’s other lovers but lying under the sheets that smelt like Haruki shortly after enjoying a secret kiss, he was certain he stood a chance at winning Haruki’s love.
His narrative will be different from what Kataro told him. His story will be very different from what happened to Kataro’s brother. He will not end his life like Kataro’s brother did.
He could understand what Kataro meant but he had hope. He believed that he could bring Haruki to like him. Haruki would love him and he would not have any reason to get depressed over a heartbreak. He soon fell asleep once again.