Chapter 153: Wake the Fuck Up, June
June’s POV
"June, you’re breaking your own heart for nothing. Ren doesn’t look at you that way. He never will. You’re chasing a fantasy, and the whole time you’re blind to the fact that I’m right here. I actually see you."
My chest cracked.
He glanced away. "You think I’m some asshole who just wants to get in your pants? Maybe I am. But at least I’m honest about wanting you. Ren? He doesn’t even notice you. Not the way I do. Not the way I always have."
The hallway spun around me. My throat burned.
Holy shit.
"You’re unbelievable." My laugh cracked. "The same guy who told me I wasn’t his type this morning? Who rips me apart every chance he get? And now what, you pin me against a wall, shove your tongue down my throat, and suddenly I’m supposed to believe you’ve been secretly in love with me? You’re sick, Ian."
He nodded, but his eyes glinted with something darker.
"You think I’m sick? Fine. But tell me this, June, if you didn’t want me, why the fuck did you kiss me back? Why did you moan when I touched you? You think I didn’t hear it? Your body already told me the truth."
My stomach sank. Heat rushed up my throat. "Fuck you," I spat, my hands shook.
"You think that means anything? I didn’t want that. I didn’t want you."
He leaned in closer, curling his lips, whispering in that low, seductive tone.
"Then why didn’t you stop me sooner?"
My chest heaved, I couldn’t breathe. "Because you pinned me, you arrogant bastard!"
His expression flickered. "Pinned you, yeah. And you melted. Don’t act like you didn’t."
Tears stung my eyes. I wanted to scream, hit him, erase the way his words clung to me.
"You’re obsessed," I choked, my voice shaking.
"At least I’m not obsessed, wasting my time pining after some guy who’ll never even think about you that way." His voice dropped low. "Wake up, June. He’s never going to see you that way."
"So this is it, huh? You tear me down, make me feel like shit, then act like I should be grateful you want me? Like I should throw myself at you because Ren doesn’t?"
His jaw flexed. He stepped closer. "You think I’d trash my own room just to get you here for fun? You think I stare at every other girl the way I stare at you? You really don’t get it, do you? You drive me insane. Every time you laugh, every time you smile, every time you look at him instead of me....it kills me."
My throat closed, heat clawing up my skin. "You’re obsessed. That’s not love, Ian. That’s not even real. You just want to fuck me, add me to your collection, like everyone else. That’s all you know how to do."
His lips twisted. "If all I wanted was your body, I could’ve had it tonight. But I didn’t. I stopped. You told me no, and I stopped. You think I’d do that if I didn’t give a damn about you?"
My head screamed liar, manipulator, bastard.
But my chest was sprinting, because some part of me knew he wasn’t lying.
"You don’t care about me," I spat. "You just want to win. That’s all this is, isn’t it? Another game. You don’t even like me....you just hate that I don’t fall at your feet like every other girl."
His eyes darkened.
"You really think I’d risk this much just to play a game?" he asked. "God, June, I’ve ruined myself for you already. Don’t you get it? Every girl I’ve been with after the day I met you. I wanted them to distract me from you. And none of them worked."
"No." I shook my head hard. "You don’t get to say that. You don’t get to twist this into some kind of tragic love story when all you’ve ever done is humiliate me, confuse me, push me around until I didn’t know which way was up."
"And yet you still kissed me back. Twice."
Shame poured through me. My lips still felt swollen. "Stop it," I snapped. "Stop saying that like it means something. I didn’t choose that. You cornered me. You kissed me. You stole it."
"I didn’t steal it. I just showed you what you’ve been pretending not to feel."
I gasped. "Pretending? Are you insane? I feel nothing for you."
He sighed.
I shoved him with everything in me, my voice started breaking as I screamed, "I hate you!"
"Hate me all you want, June. Hating me cos I told you the truth or confessed me feelings? You’re hilarious."
I folded my arms, staring at him.
"The other night at the rink. I couldn’t get you out of my head. When you caught me staring at you while you were singing. When you came to watch the game. Hell, even when you went to see Ren? You don’t think I saw that either? The way you kept fixing your hair, tugging at your dress, checking your reflection like maybe if you looked perfect enough he’d finally see you?"
"So you’re stalking me now?" I glared at him.
He kept going, relentless.
"You changed yourself for him. For a guy who doesn’t even give a fuck. And it kills me watching you twist yourself inside out for someone who’ll never look at you the way you want. Ren doesn’t like you for you, June. You know that."
"Shut up." My voice cracked, but he didn’t stop.
You don’t need to do any of that for me." His gaze dragged down me. "Not the exposing dresses. Not pretending to be someone you’re not."
My stomach twisted. His words sank in.
"I already notice you," he said, softer this time. "I’ve been noticing you since day one."
My hands shook.
Then his jaw tightened. "Wake the fuck up, June. Ren’s not gonna choose you over his girlfriend."
For a second, I wanted to claw his eyes out. Tell him he didn’t know shit, that he was lying, twisting my feelings just to get under my skin.
"You don’t know what the hell you’re talking about," I snapped, but my voice cracked, betraying me.
God, Ian was right.
I felt it crack inside me. The ugly truth I didn’t want to admit: I’d been killing myself, trying to make someone see me who never would.
Ian was actually right.
I had adjusted my hair. Wore that floral dress, smoothed it several times. Binge watched makeup tutorial videos overnight. Checked the damn mirror ten times before Ren walked out.
And the way Ren smiled at me... God, that his soft, sweet smile, it was enough to make my chest ache for days. He was gentle, patient, kind in ways Ian could never be.
But Ian’s words... they stabbed deeper because they felt true. Ren was nice, sure. Sweet even. But never mine. Never looking at me the way I wanted. Not like this. Not like Ian was staring at me right now
My throat closed, my eyes burned. I shook my head, but the tears came anyway.
Ren had a girlfriend, I just have to accept that.